tap into my fav one night stand

As I’m swiping left & right on this Feeld app I cant help but ghasp as I see one of the most beautiful man Ive ever seen. His pictures where classy yet natural. He wasn’t trying too hard yet he was def putting an effort.

The words on his description moved things inside of me, I can’t yet explain.

As I’m clicking the like button I visualized our match. I knew we liked each other & ofcourse, we matched.

Conversation started pouring in. Laughter, excitement & just all the feels. My absolute favorite part of dating.

We plan a date, your classy restaurant. It’s here that I always catch how in their masculine they are, the way they plan & invite you out. And oh baby, did he excell.

Next thing you know, Im walking my way to the meet up spot. Jitters, nerves on high but deep trust at the same time. I knew I was about to have one of the best nights of my life, I had no doubt.

He shows up wearing the white sleeve shirt, black mid rise pants, perfect mustache, rusky cologne… honey I thought pinterest & my fav rom com movies had just spit this man in front of me.

I literally couldnt even think well and formulate decent sentences at first. He kissed my cheeck and instantly took a whiff of my perfume and just took it in and smiled. We locked eyes for what seemed to be a blissfull eternity. At that point I knew he knew I was his and he knew I knew he was mine for the night.

We spent 4 hours at the restaurant and I can’t even list all of the subjects we debated. We found ways to turn each others brains in ways I still reminisce on while still keeping so much flirty energy.

He always looked me in the eyes when I spoke. He never interrupted me. He asked the most profound questions.

Next thing you know we are eating dessert of each others spoons and looking around noticing the whole place got empty. We were both so into each other the whole outside felt irrelevant.

We finally leave the restaurant, and he grabs my hand for the first time. They locked in perfectly. He was tall, and I had to look up to talk to him. He seemed determined yet gentle.

In one of the street crossings, waiting for the light to change, he pulls me near and softly kisses me.

Fast foward lots of walking & talking, I’m laying in his sofa, while he is dimming the lights, playing jazz and serving me water.

I took in the whole place. It was neat, clean & full of books I had already read.

I take a book and ask him questions, we continue debating until our whole bodies couldn’t resist not being fully together.

Things slowed down. There was no rush. We took our time with every kiss, every piece of clothing falling, every now and then our eyes will lock in again & we would just breath together.

Our energies were so delicious together it felt intoxicating in the best way possible.

He picked me up, kissed me against the wall and brought me to the room, where he laid me down gently.

I lost track of what was real & what wasnt.

Our bodies & mind became one.

So much happened when finally my yoni kept calling him in. It felt as if she wanted to devour yet carress him. She became an entity on her own, willing to make decisions & take action without me playing a role. I fully let her take control. I gave into her. & so did he.

Once inside, a rush of energy flowed through all of my body. We both let our minds disappear and allowed our bodies to be bodies and our energetic bodies to make love to each other.

We were primal. We were gentle. We went slow. Then we went rough. We just went in all of the realms.

My period came. I felt so free. He took time to honor her & honor me. Not an inch of disgust in his face. Full adoration.

We took time to see, touch and kiss every inch of each others bodies.

We used our voices. We told each other how beautiful & sexy we both were. There wasnt even a need to speak about what we liked or didnt because our bodies where totally on the same rythm.

We breath & mowned together. We screamed, we laughed & yes we cried too.

We reached heights I didnt even know existed.

We hugged, cuddled, bathed and just enjoyed each others presence for the remaining of the night.

We said goodbye to each other with our hearts full.

I truly believe we both gifted each other so much.

___________________

This wasnt your typical one night stand.

I do believe casual sex can also be sacred sex. As long as you are both honoring each other, creating a safe container & you both have clear communication.

As “unsexy” as it may sound to you, we did find time in all of that to ask the right questions, to shed light on safe sex practices & disclose any important information before we went there.

1 night stands can be beautiful if they are treated with respect and all parties are disclosing their expectations, desires, current relationship status, and latest test screening results.

I have some tips on how to screen someone before exposing yourself to these spaces but the reality is I base my ultimate decision on my intuition. Does my body, soul & mind feel good around this person? & yes, this can be concluded almost immediately in the first 15 mins.

My number one rule tho; I don’t make these decisions under any influence. Alcohol diminishes the power of your intuition and your judgement. You fall way easier into old patterns, wether its the “man pleaser” or even jumping back into faking orgasms.

Getting here has taken me a lot of time & a lot of solo self pleasure. There where times in my life where I couldnt even think about sex if it wasnt under alcohol influence. I associated getting turned on with Tequila, no kidding. But the reality is having sober sex meant my insecurities and my mind were loud as fuck and I couldn’t ignore them. Under alcohol I felt more brave & playful in bed.

This is why self love & sacred sex go hand by hand. I don’t think you can truly experience this kind of sex without cultivating self love.

It is this love that allows you to know your worth and show up in bed confident.

I is this love that allows you to relax and accept the love you are receiving.

Sometimes it’s not that the men who you are having sex with don’t show you love, sometimes its that you can’t even accept it. You think they are bullshitting you.

They tell you your’re sexy and it makes you feel awkward because you dont believe you are sexy so ofcourse they must be lying… You start getting turned on and your body want to express it in a specific face or noise and you repress it because you are afraid he won’t like it or its ugly. He starts caressing other parts of your body, and again your insecurities rise up, and you pull him into the comfort zones not knowing its in those unexplored spaces where your deepest pleasure might lie on.

You are in your head.

& thats okay, most of us are. You are not broken. There is light on the other side.

This is where diving into Tantric & self love practices has helped me so much.